The Shrinking LouLou

The Beginning : 28/7/08 & 29/7/08

2008-07-29T22:23:43+02:00

Good evening all,

I am currently sitting in my garden listening to midnight train to georgia and suprisingly happy. I didnt write last night because i was in a no energy grump and now i have come to write about last night i cant express properly what i was feeling ...... anyway here goes.

Monday 28th July 2008

Mondays are never a good day particularly but i felt suprisingly ok. Normally Martin would drive me to work but since he has had a recent passion for work (and i hope that is all it is) he has been leaving early so i was suppose to walk to work but i ended up getting a taxi (naughty naught) i did blame this on the fact work would possibly be to hot so i had to take a fan!

I knew work wouldnt be to much of a hasstle as the boss always eats healthyly so there was no chance of smells tempting me, infact he is a bit of a salad addict as far as im concerned and he is always suportive in his funny little ways!

Upstairs in the office we have another company there, i wasnt intending on mentioning it to them but ended up having to because my blender is so bloody noisy.

Everything was going well untill one of my contractors who shall remian nameless wrang my boss to say he was coming in and got him to ask me if i wanted a bucket of KFC knows damn well what i was upto. This didnt bother me and i ended up asking my boss if he would really do that? The boss replied that he didnt think he would be that cruel!

So the contractor turns up, i see him walking into the car park KFC bucket free i was relived but then in he comes and goes over to my boss and gives him a chicken sarnie from gregs then comes over to me and gives me a bottle of diet coke and a cheese sandwich (im getting hungry even thinking about it. I was furious but politely told him that i was very thankfull but unfortunately i couldnt except either he told me that it would be fine and that id sweat it out due to the heat,he then told me that he would have half and no one would have to know and explained why what i am doing is dangerous, well if he is that much of a fucking nutrionist why the hell is he so big ? anyway arguing didnt get me any where so he left the sandwich on my desk staring me in the face and as soon as he left i had a big bitch and put it in the fride HOW FUCKING UNSUPPORTIVE ...... DICK!

End of the day arrived and i was so full with water, when martin turned up he was in a stress and got me in a right fluster this is not what i needed at the time so i turned into "i want to shout at everyone loulou" then mum turned up i belive this is called saved my the bell ? I had to take my dog to the vets to get his nails cut, i think he must of picked up on my anger as he was playing up slightly when we got there we realised martin had booked us in with the wrong vet (my dog is a rescue rotwiller and is very particular of who he likes and who doesnt)I knew he wouldnt like this vet as she is not even very good with communicating with humans anyway the dog got muzzled and started bucking and the vet in turn cut his nail to short and the blood started pouring AAAAHHH i wanted to kill everyone in my path.

Had to stop off on the way home to a client for a mini meeting but this was quite calming so didnt mind, when i got home all i wanted was to go to tesco to get nail polish for my "mee time box" but unfortunately due to the fact people like to "play pikey" they lock the cosmetics away. Ny this time i was acting like a spoilt child and thought i should just go home, have my chicken soup and try and make buscuits out of mikshake (what a stupid mentall retarded idea not suprised it didnt work out)After the busciut insident it was time for bed i was knackered.

Tuesday 29th July 2008

Today taxi again whoops !! the excuse today was i had ice cubes in my bag ?

anyway the day went really well apart from contractor ringing up to ask if i wanted some chips! the boss ended up eating the cheese sarnie i left in the fridge. I figured out today that if i water down the shakes more then it is not so hard to eat !! good work i thought there is hope for me yet!

Day finished at work and came home to get ready for the "drop in session" with the lighterlife crew. Everyone there seemed to be a lot more chatty and a lot more supportive which was nice.When we arrived we had to go tothe toilet to wee on a ph stick this would tell is if we are now in ketosis (fat burning mode)mine said i was but dehidrated, apparently when in ketosis this suppresses your appetite...we shall see, anyway we got weighed and i have lost 3 pounds in three days Whoop WHOOp! so i am down to 11stone 13 pounds. We had our photo's taken and our measurement taken (ill put them in tomorrws blog becuase cant be assed to move and get them)we also got given our "bars" today which i have been lookingforward to greatly and i needed to chew on something other than martins ear. I made a nice friend in the group today, she has just moved to the area and lives quite close so we have exchanged numbers so we can meet up, this is good as all my friends live in the next town.

Got home and had my first bar it was a toffee one, it was discusting so only eat half of it and decided i would have half of the peanut bar this was nice and like a tracker bar.

This takes me to now, i am tired and starting to feel sick now so i will sign off for the evening but i would say that i am deffinately in a better state than the first day and am looking forward to the propper weigh in on saturday, anyway night.

Comments

The Beginning: 27/7/08

2008-07-27T23:17:02+02:00

Sunday 27th July 2008
MMM evening !

I have had a really ruff day. I had a brilliant BBQ yesterday loads of meat and friends but very aware that this would be the last supper, and to be honest with you i started to get a bit upset of what was ahead, as they tell you in your councelling sessions this course is like an alcoholic being taken away from drink, but obvivously in my case its food.

Well i woke up this morning to find my bed was empty apart from myself, looked out the window and my partner and my BBQ friends were outside having their morning coffee, my partner asked me if i faniced "one of those things" (by this i was hoping he ment my lightlife food packs) he did and we proceeded to make my first shake.

So the powder got mixed with the water ect and suprisingly it smelt like it was ment to (rasberrys), so quite happy with the result i went for my first gulp, i can honestly say that i have never smelt something that tasted so different than it did from the smell, i may aswell off put a cardboard box in the blender, if fact im still feeling quite stomach churny from it.

I decided i needed to be out of the house today with all that left over food, so decided to go to my mum's for a bit of support and luckily supportive she was. I did however remember that on sunday myself and Martin usually go to his parents for a roast and a big lovely roast it always is, Martin said that we didnt have to go but bearing in mind Martin needs to eat i said we would go. In the end Martin decided he would eat at home and we would go to his parents to see them after they finished eating (they decided the roast was out the window due to the heat but the BBQ was on! aaahhh)

So whilst at mums i had a chicken soup and a choclate shake ontop of all the water i have to drink and to be honest they were not to bad but felt really really sick so all off this sickness and not liking the foodpacks is putting me off the food.

We turned up at Martins parents only to find that they were still eating this did not bother me as much as i thought it would at all in fact i was quite proud of myself. We discussed the holiday we are due to go on in 4 weeks and it made me think deeply about being able to cope on holiday without food and booze and it is eating away at my head, ill proberly explain tomorrow but right now i am sooooooo tired.

After leaving Martins parents we discussed what he would have for dinner and he told me he would eat it in the other room, i am sure thqt this would be preferential to some people but to me it seems sneaky and id rather everything was normal as i dont want to feel uncomfortable.

I have been so miserable today because i have been starving and i think it is only because i have been thinking about this damn not eating normal food stuff, i have told myself not to give up because hunger is expected, its not saying im allergic to the diet so therefore i give up, this is a nateral reaction. I am however pissed off that everything i read from the lightlife magazine so far the articals people have written say that they were not hungry atall in the first week , i suppose that they have to write things to encourage people to join BUT THIS DOES NOT HELP ME i want to know that other people were going through the same as i am.

im such a grumpy bitch aaaaahhhhh i just want to cry ! I will write again tomorrow.

Comments

The Beginning

2008-07-26T17:18:10+02:00

When i was at school my teacher told me that every story has a beginning a middle and an end. I was never good at school but i am determind that this story will have all of the above.

The main purpose of this blog is so that i can relect and also so that people who dont understand what i am doing WILL.

So i am Laura, i am a 23 year old Female who is 5foot and weigh 12st 4. I have been having problems with my own personal image and have decided that i will something to change that. After reasearching lots of different diets, i found Lighterlife.

Lighterlife is a VLCD (very low calorie diet) and i was very keen to find out more so i made the first step of contacting the local lighterlife councellor.

Last Sunday i met up with the local Councillor, she is a very nice and seems a very understanding and helpfull lady. She explained that i would be off conventional food and everything drinkable apart from black tea, black coffe and water for the next 14 weeks, should i choose to take part. However this does not been you starve yourself, you are given food packs everyweek, these consist of shakes, soups and bars. Everyday you must eat four of these to add up to your RDA of things that keep you going such as vitamins.

So after learning about the inns and outs everything seemed well and good and i was very keen, the only thing that was holding me back was the cost. Its £66 pounds a week for the 28 food packs (4 packs X 7 days), 2 hours of councilling a week and total support. Ok it sounds alot but considering how much i spend of booze, take aways, snacks and weekly shopping i think i will be making a saving!.

I will addmit i have told people about this diet i am starting which was possibly not the best idea as most of them have tried to talk me out of it without knowing the full facts and therefore making me not feel positive about what it is I WANT TO DO FOR MYSELF, but i will refer them to this blog where i will be completely honest about everything and i can promise that if it doesnt make me happy and causes me problems i will stop, but untill then NO ONE IS GOING TO STOP ME.

My dream is to loose this awfull belly, take the weight off my knees and be able to fit into nice clothes without looking like a cow squeezed into a condom and to live my life not as the fat person i am destined to be.

Saturday 26th July 2008 - The First session

So i have been to my first session today at 10 am (very tired, it was too hot to sleep last night)i had been told that i am due to start my foodpacks on Sunday which is good as we are having a BBQ at home today and i love BBQ food.I was very nervous about going to the session today due to all the negativity that i have had but i went and im glad i did.

I arrived at the venue very nervous about who i was going to meet, what was going to happen ect. Everyone bar one trned up so there was only 6 people in my group, the ages ranged from 18-58 so there was a good range and it was refrressing to see people around my age.We discussed all sorts of things including confidentiality, (hence why i will only be blogging about myself and not gossiping about anyone else)setting ground rules and what was ahead of this journey.

I ordered my food packs and ordered a wide range just so i could try everything so i could decide what it is that i liked or not. We were not allowed to order bars as we will be able to have one when we go for a drop in session on tuesday which we will have just to check that everything is ok and that we are coping, I think by then i will be dying to chew on something.

I got weighed and according to their scales i weight 12 stone 2 so this will be in my mind my starting weight. I am sooo excited about the possiblity of getting into my old clothes and re gaining my confidence oh and this last supper i am about to eat.

Will write again tomorrow but if you want to check out more information about the diet, go to www.lighterlife.co.uk

Comments